Friday, February 6, 2009

Went back WWSS to see 4Desperados today. Finally gave out the stickers after holding it for so long. They might be 4Dauntless now, but I still prefer 4 Desperados. I would rather believe that they're desperate to do well in their O-level.

Dauntless might dictate fearlessness, but if fearlessness means them not worried about their studies, I detest that name. The bible has a saying, that 'The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.' I'm not a believer, but I do believe that fear makes a person wiser. Only when you've experienced fear do you truly reflect on your actions and mistakes.

If you've lost a love one, or on the brink of losing one, that's when you start to appreciate what you have. I never did appreciate my k-pa when he was alive, always finding him annoying and disturbing, but when he fell sick and changed, I missed his old-self. And when he passed away, it hurts very deeply, and every now and then, when I think of him, my heart weeps and I fear losing my k-ma.

Frankly, I feel rather helpless sometimes. I joined the teaching profession because I want to change lives and make a difference. Many people would probably find that a model answer, but that is what I really want to do. But having gone through contract teaching for half a year, or less, I struggled to do so. It is so difficult to translate my care and concern for the students, when they don't seem to understand what I'm worrying about. And along the way, I've become a naggy fella; nagging endlessly.

It was then that I understood nagging is form of love language, so to speak. Just as parents nagged because they're worried about us, I nagged my students, because I'm worried about them. Funny huh?